What I finds, I keeps.

A large distraction from being able to fully enjoy and be present in life is the perceived necessity for money, and by extension, our collective obsession with productivity. The cult of productivity has made slaves of even the most well-intentioned people. It’s an illusion but the most persistent kind.

I spent years of my life in service of this illusion and I can feel it creeping into the periphery, begging for my attention again. As with any illusion, once it is broken, all you need to do is look at it with a new set of eyes and it crumbles. The set of eyes I now possess are capable of this deconstruction in a moment. Since it took years for this illusion to really build and take root, it may well take years before it stops.

Just now, as I read the previous passage and scanned for clarity, mistakes, etc., the illusion presented itself to me. “You need to get up and do something. This is not providing anything of worth to the world. No one is reading this, and if they are, they are rolling their eyes the whole time.” Oh, I forgot to mention, the illusion has a voice, and it’s only ever critical. I can handle constructive criticism, but this is all a bunch of bad-faith “get to work” style berating.

There is the illusion, plain as day, trying every trick in the book to get me to concede to it. I already conceded. I will never live under the grip of this illusion again.

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